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Ten years ago today, I went out in the morning to run errands, much as I did this morning. When I arrived home, my son told me that my sister, Brenda, had called while I was out. Soon the phone rang again; it was my sister calling back.

It was about noon, and I had a student coming for math tutoring at 1 PM. Still, I took the time to sit and talked with her, giving her my undivided attention. We talked for about forty-five minutes. She said good-bye, and we hung up.

I am grateful that I spent those precious moments talking to her because, unbeknownst to me, that would be the last time I would have the opportunity to do so. Sadly, she passed away later that evening. In losing my sister so suddenly and at such a young age (she was 41), I was reminded again of the brevity of life.

Here are some other thoughts that come to my mind:

1. God does not promise any one of us a tomorrow.  The Bible tells us, “If it is the Lord’s will, we will live, and we will do this or that” (James 4:15). Today is the day of salvation.  What will we do with today?
2. I am reminded to thank God for every day. The Bible tells us, “This is the day the Lord has made; we will rejoice and be glad in it” (Psalm 118:24). Treasure each day that God has given to you.
3. Though we lead busy lives, it is people that are really most important.  Author John Maxwell writes, “When people are esteemed, relationships are redeemed.” The Apostle Paul writes, “Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself” (Philippians 2:3). How grateful I am that, by God’s grace, I did not rush our phone conversation, though I truly did have other things on my mind. How easy it is to forget this; but how important to remember!
4. We grieve, but God tells us that in our grief it is possible to have hope. He says, “But I do not want you to be ignorant, brethren, concerning those who have fallen asleep, lest you sorrow as others who have no hope. For if we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so God will bring with Him those who sleep in Jesus” (I Thessalonians 4:13-14).  During times of grief, we often ask the really important questions of life. It is in Christ that we can find answers. We can trust in a living Savior. We can trust Him with life, with our eternal life, and with the lives of our loved ones.
5. God has given us family and friends to be a comfort to each other. He tells us, “Comfort one another with these words” (I Thessalonians 5:18). Be willing to accept the comfort of others. And, each day ask yourself: “Is there anyone who needs my comfort today.

It is my prayer that “the God of all comfort” will comfort each of us.

God speaks to us about Truth and Love when He says, “…that we…, speaking the truth in love, may grow up in all things into Him who is the head—Christ—” (Ephesians 4:14-15)

In the Psalms, we are reminded of the importance of truth in our hearts. The Psalmist writes, “LORD, who may abide in Your tabernacle? Who may dwell in Your holy hill? He who walks uprightly, and works righteousness, and speaks the truth in his heart; he who does not backbite with his tongue, nor does evil to his neighbor, nor does he take up a reproach against his friend… He who does these things shall never be moved.” (Psalm 15:1-3, 5)

Our tongue can be used to bring healing, or to “backbite.”

In the book of Isaiah, God reminds us of the results of putting away “…the pointing of the finger.” He tells us, “If you take away the yoke from your midst, the pointing of the finger, and speaking wickedness… The LORD will guide you continually, and satisfy your soul in drought, and strengthen your bones; you shall be like a watered garden, and like a spring of water, whose waters do not fail.” (Isaiah 58:9b, 11)

Author Elisabeth Elliot reminds us of the importance of speaking the truth to others. She writes, “It seems to me that life is all too short to let embarrassment deprive us and our friends of the pleasure of telling the happy truth. Suppose the boy who does your lawn does it fast, trims it perfectly, and takes care of the tools? Suppose the clerk who waits on you happens to be the most gracious one you’ve ever encountered? Suppose even that your husband–when you stop for once to look at him, to think about him as a person and as a man–seems to you to be the best man you know? Tell them. Tell them now.” (Elisabeth Eliot, All That Was Ever Ours)

In her book, Streams in the Desert, Mrs. Charles Coleman tells this story:

“There is a story of an old man who carried a little can of oil with him everywhere he went, and if he passed through a door that squeaked, he poured a little oil on the hinges. If a gate was hard to open, he oiled the latch. And thus he passed through life lubricating all hard places and making it easier for those who came after him.

“People called him eccentric, queer, and cranky; but the old man went steadily on refilling his can of oil when it became empty, and oiled the hard places he found.

“There are many lives that creak and grate harshly as they live day by day. Nothing goes right with them. They need lubricating with the oil of gladness, gentleness, or thoughtfulness. Have you your own can of oil with you? Be ready with your oil of helpfulness in the early morning to the one nearest you. It may lubricate the whole day for him. The oil, of good cheer to the downhearted one–Oh, how much it may mean! The word of courage to the despairing. Speak it.

“Our lives touch others but once, perhaps, on the road of life; and then, mayhap, our ways diverge, never to meet again. The oil of kindness has worn the sharp, hard edges off of many a sin-hardened life and left it soft and pliable and ready for the redeeming grace of the Saviour.

“A word spoken pleasantly is a large spot of sunshine on a sad heart.”

(Mrs. Charles Coleman, Streams in the Desert, 1925, Dec. 8 )

Hymn-writer Ina Ogdon reminds us, “Just above are clouded skies that you may help to clear, Let not narrow self your way debar; Though into one heart alone may fall your song of cheer, Brighten the corner where you are.” (1913)

I am praying that during this season of celebrating and visiting with family and friends, that our hearts would be touched by God’s grace so that the words that we speak will be words of healing and encouragement.

May we be lights which shine before men, that our Father in heaven might be glorified. (Matthew 5:16)

Today, I am remembering a great lady.

Trudy Seymour
June 23, 1925 – June 6, 2006

She was a blessing to all who knew her. I was blessed and honored to have her as my mom.

My mother lived the words of this verse: “Be kind and compassionate to one another…” (Ephesians 4:32 niv)

She was a kind, gracious, compassionate woman.

When I was 7 years old, I spent 6 months off and on in Jefferson Hospital. My mom would come at 8 AM, and stay till visiting hours were over in the evening, taking the subway and the bus through the streets of Philadelphia to a friend’s house where she was staying. Barbie dolls and Crazy Eights occupied our time while she waited each day for news from the doctors. When I was finally released from the hospital, she took care of me at home, in addition to serving in the roles of wife, homemaker, and mother.

My mom loved children. She exemplified the words of Jesus when He said: “I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. And whoever welcomes a little child like this in my name welcomes me.” (Matthew 18:3-5 niv)

And also when He said: “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.” (Matthew 19:14 niv)

Each year, one of the highlights of Mom’s summer was Vacation Bible School. When I was young, she took us to VBS at Green Ridge Primitive Methodist Church. Later, she was a faithful worker at Country Alliance Church’s VBS. One VBS co-worker recently wrote: “Oh, I remember the years Trudy would be there every day of VBS servin’ up the cookies and juice! She would talk to every kid there…” When my children were younger, they would sometimes spend the week with their grandma, because she wanted to take them to VBS with her.

One song that I remember my mom singing is:

Jesus bids us shine with a clear, pure light,
Like a little candle burning in the night;
In this world of darkness, we must shine,
You in your small corner, and I in mine.

Jesus bids us shine, first of all for Him;
Well He sees and knows it if our light is dim;
He looks down from heaven, sees us shine,
You in your small corner, and I in mine.

Jesus bids us shine, then, for all around,
Many kinds of darkness in this world abound:
Sin, and want, and sorrow—we must shine,
You in your small corner, and I in mine.

–Susan B. Warner

May we all be comforted and blessed as we remember fondly this humble, compassionate servant, and grateful to God for His gift to us.

“Comfort, yes, comfort My people!” (Isaiah 40:1 nkj)

This article first appeared in Christianity Today in September, 1982. Good for me to be reminded, again.

“It was December 1958. The tragic parochial school fire in Chicago was being reported on the evening news. One of the teachers was being interviewed. She told of the panic, the suffocating heat, the smoke that blackened out the room in daylight, and of herding the children out the window and down the ladders, assisted by the firemen.

“Struggling for control, the sister described how she climbed through the window and down the ladder, across the roof, then down another ladder to the ground. ‘I looked up at the windows billowing black smoke. It was then,’ she said simply, tears streaming down her face, ‘that I saw the one I missed.’

“Amid the pressures of today, the increasing global turmoil—the smoke that blackens the room in daylight—we who are Christians must be alert. Is there a letter we need to write? Some simple deed of kindness we should do? An encouraging word to give to someone who is desperate to hear? Time we ought to take to listen? Is there someone we should invite for a meal or a cup of tea?

“We need concern. We need compassion. This is not the same as sharing the gospel. Opportunities like these simply allow us to show genuine love, to earn the right to be heard.

“God forbid that the time should ever come when we will have to look back and see ‘the one we missed.’”

(Ruth Graham, Christianity Today, September 3, 1982)

In late April, 1991, we were expecting our seventh child. By the end of the month, we knew that the time was near.

On April 30, my friend Lisa N. came for lunch. She offered to stay with our six children while Tom and I went to my obstetrician appointment. I sat in the doctor’s office, and timed contractions. They occurred about every 10 minutes.

Dr. B’s office was packed. He had been away the week before. When he saw me, he said, “Oh, you waited, that’s good!”

When the doctor examined me, he said that I was 3 to 4 centimeters dilated. He said that I could go to the hospital, or I could go home and “let nature take it’s course.” The nurse at the doctor’s office said that I should go to the hospital. “You don’t want Tom to deliver this baby,” she said.

Instead of going to the hospital, we went to the mall. It gave me an opportunity to walk around. We had dinner at Arby’s. Then we drove down to the hospital. The contractions were pretty hard, but still 10 to 20 minutes apart. “Let’s go home,” I said. We went into the hospital, and told them that we were not coming in just yet.

We arrived home around 7 PM. I smelled pine cleaner, and heard children in the bathroom. Really clean kids, huh?

Lisa had bathed the children, and had also cleaned the kitchen floor.

“I am not sure what we are doing,” I said.

“Do you want me to stay over night?” she asked.

Lisa went to her weekly Bible Study. Another friend stopped by, and together we timed my contractions. By 9:44 PM, the contractions were closer together, Lisa came back to stay overnight, and Tom and I left for the hospital.

When they checked me, I was about 5 centimeters dilated. They put me on heartbeat/contraction monitors. Not very comfortable; but I’m glad they did. The baby’s heartbeat began to go down with each contraction. The nurse came in and gave me an oxygen mask, and tried to give me an I.V. Ouch! She couldn’t get it in. Dr. B. came in shortly thereafter. He said, “We have to get this one out quick.” Push—Push—Push. He’s out. The baby had had a prolapsed cord. With each contraction, he was squishing the umbilical cord.

Tom held him. I held him. I tried to nurse him, but he wasn’t ready. I thought, “That’s OK.” We oogled over him for quite a while. The obstetrician left.

The nurse then asked us if we were ready to have him cleaned and weighed. “OK,” I said.

When she came back, she stated: “You are not going to believe this – he weighs 3 pounds, 14 ounces.” Since he was so small, they put him in the Pediatric Intensive Care Unit.

Tom stayed with me till I got settled into a room. It was about 2 AM. We both cried. How frightened and worried I was!

At about 4 AM, the pediatrician came by my room to see me. “What can I do you to help you sleep,” she asked. I told her that I thought it would help if I saw him again. She arranged for a wheel chair for me to ride down to see Peter. She patiently answered my questions and addressed my fears.

I was released from the hospital on Friday, May 3, 1991. Peter was still in the NICU.

For the next two weeks, friends provided meals and helped with the children. Our family continued with homeschooling responsibilities. I visited Peter every day.

One day, as I stood and looked at Peter in the isolet, I remembered words from a children’s CD: “Kids,” the character Psalty says, “You don’t have to trust God to get you to the top of the mountain. You only have to trust God to get you to the next step.” “Oh,” I thought, “I can do that!”

God writes in His Word: “Each day has enough trouble of its own.” (Matthew 6)

My thought: Don’t borrow trouble from tomorrow. Trust God for today.

On Wednesday, May 8, my mom and dad visited. They stayed at our house with the other children; I went to the hospital. Later, my mom and dad brought the other children to the hospital. Tom came from work and met us there. The “peanut gallery” were able to view Peter through the window observation post.

On May 17, Peter was discharged from the hospital. He weighed 4 pounds, 8 ounces. He was able to nurse; he was gaining weight; and his body temperature was stabilized.

Today, May 1, 2009, our Peter turned 18.

Last year, the night before his 17th birthday, I hugged him, and I wiped a tear.

“It was a long time ago, Mom,” he said tenderly; perceptively.

“I know,” I said, “but I remember… and I am continually grateful to God for His faithfulness.”

“But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself.” (Matthew 6:33-34 nasb)

A recently headline on CNN.com reads: “Recession fears. Mortgage crisis. Jobs at risk.”

A reminder from God’s Word; imperatives that never go out of style:

“If there is a poor man among your brothers in any of the towns of the land that the LORD your God is giving you, do not be hardhearted or tightfisted toward your poor brother. Rather be openhanded and freely lend him whatever he needs….

“Give generously to him and do so without a grudging heart; then because of this the LORD your God will bless you in all your work and in everything you put your hand to. There will always be poor people in the land. Therefore I command you to be openhanded toward your brothers and toward the poor and needy in your land.”

(Deuteronomy 15:7-11 niv)

May God continue to bless us with His grace and His compassion.

For those of you whose children are young, there is good news and bad news.

The good news is: “They won’t always be this little.”

The bad news is: “They won’t always be this little.”

When my children were little, I had a plaque on the wall to remind me of this important fact.

Here is the poem:

Babies Don’t Keep
by Ruth Hulbert Hamilton

Mother, O Mother, come shake out your cloth,
Empty the dustpan, poison the moth,
Hang out the washing, make up the bed,
Sew on a button and butter the bread.
Where is the mother whose house is so shocking?
She’s up in the nursery, blissfully rocking.

Oh, I’ve grown as shiftless as Little Boy Blue,
Lullabye, rockabye, lullabye loo.
Dishes are waiting and bills are past due,
Lullabye, rockaby, lullabye loo.
The shopping’s not done and there’s nothing for stew
And out in the yard there’s a hullabaloo,
But I’m playing Kanga and this is my Roo,
Lullabye, rockaby lullabye loo.

The cleaning and scrubbing can wait till tomorrow
But children grow up as I’ve learned to my sorrow.
So quiet down cobwebs;
Dust go to sleep!
I’m rocking my baby and babies don’t keep.

Remembering with you that the hand that rocks the cradle is the hand that rules the world.

Thank you to Mrs. Hamilton for reminding us.

Our words should:

(1)    Build others up.

(2)    Be according to _their_ needs.

(3)    Benefit those who listen.

Immediately, I might think, “But no one _else_ talks like that! Why should I??”

A thought: the only person that I can control is myself.  Regardless of what others are doing, I can speak words of grace.  Also, rather than taking my cues from other people, I should remember that God is present with me wherever I am; I should take my cues from Him.

Another thought might be: “But there’s NO WAY that my words sound like this.  I don’t even think I could do it if I tried…”

The good news is that God already knew that.  If I admit that on my own, I cannot speak words of grace, or think more of others than I think of myself, then I am on the _right_ track.  This is what the incarnation is all about.  God entered history, lived the life of obedience that I could _never_ have lived, and died in my place.  It is because of the cross that I can have the power to speak words that build others up, are according to their needs, and benefit those who listen.

For more thoughts on the power of the cross, and the Gospel of Christ, click on “Pursuit of Wisdom” (above).

Best wishes for a peaceful holiday!

The late Fred Rogers, from PBS’s Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood, once said:

“More and more I’ve come to understand that
listening is one of the most important things
we can do for one another.

“Whether the other is speaking or playing or dancing,
building or singing or painting,
if we care, we can listen.

“Listening is where caring begins.”

In the Bible, author James tells us: ”My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires. (James 1:19-20)

Here are some more thoughts from God’s Word regarding listening:

“He who answers before listening— that is his folly and his shame.” (Proverbs 18:13)

”The way of a fool seems right to him, but a wise man listens to advice.” (Proverbs 12:15)

”Listen, my sons, to a father’s instruction; pay attention and gain understanding.” (Proverbs 4:1)

The Bible also tells us that there are some things to which we should NOT listen:

”A wicked man listens to evil lips; a liar pays attention to a malicious tongue.” (Proverbs 17:4)

”A false witness will perish, and whoever listens to him will be destroyed forever.” (Proverbs 21:28)

We are told that the lips of “an adulteress “drip honey,” and that her speech is “smoother than oil; but in the end she is bitter as gall, sharp as a double-edged sword.” (Proverbs 5:1-4)

When wondering which voices to which we should listen, we can be like the Apostles, who said:
”We must obey God rather than men!” (Acts 5:29)

I will admit that on my own, I am not at all a good listener.
On my own, I care more about me than about listening to others.

Thankfully, through the power given me by Christ, I can be what I would otherwise not be.
[“I can do everything through him who gives me strength.” Philippians 4:13]

Songwriter Keith Getty puts it this way: “This the power of the cross: Christ became sin for us. Took the blame, bore the wrath—We stand forgiven at the cross.” (www.gettymusic.com)

At the cross, we stand forgiven. Because of the work that Christ did on the cross, we are given the ability to do that which we could not otherwise do.

[Not sure about this? click on “Pursuit of Wisdom”/”Do You Know For Sure?” (above)]

When I remember who Christ is, and what He did for me, I can have this ability to become a better listener.

My prayer is that God, by His grace, will enable each of us to listen better to Him through His Word,
to be ‘clothed’ with the compassion that comes from Him (Colossians 3:12),
to become better listeners.

May God help each of us hear the “silent cries” of others in need
(family members, friends, neighbors, and even strangers.)

Because of Christ, each day I can grow to be more “quick to listen …”